For those feeling particularly plagued this holiday season by demands on time, attention, desirability, likability, and – that fickle friend – technology.
Just a reminder that your value is not determined by how quickly you respond to messages; how frequently you pick up calls; how much you interact on social media; or how much you Snapchat, IG, WhatsApp, whatever.
I mean, how fucking exhausting and unsustainable is that measure?
Rather — your energy in someone’s presence; the warmth you emit through twinkling eyes; the boisterousness of your laugh; the support that you give in the form of warm words, “I love you’s”, warm meals, and a bed to sleep in — these are hallmarks of your worth.
Which is immeasurable. You must believe this. Not in these back-and-forth screen games that other people wanna play.
You must refuse to checkmark your relationships, to follow if:then rules about how you should receive love:
If you do X; you will be loved
If you do not; you will be abandoned
Fuck that. Relationships are not a check list. Reciprocated love is not an algorithm you can crack.
You must believe that the people who love you, love you for your presence and energy; for what you give in time and attention and devotion, not for quick quotas met on a screen.